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34 Zombie Jokes That Are Dead Funny

34 Zombie Jokes That Are Dead Funny

Looking for some funny zombie jokes that will wake up the dead? Here are some classic zombie jokes that are great whether you are looking to stir up some laughs for Halloween or to lighten up the mood on a scary night!

Let’s get into these funny zombie jokes that will have you laughing away.

Best Zombie Jokes That Will Wake Up You Up!

Best Zombie Jokes That Will Wake Up You Up!

Why did the zombie say when it was being chased by a bounty hunter?
You will never take me alive!

What do you call a row of zombies?
A deadline.

What do you call a zombie sleepover?
A mass grave.

What do single male zombies look for in a woman?
Brains.

Did you know that there was a mob of zombies outside my house last night and they would not stop moaning “brains! brains! brains!”
So I went out there and gave them a piece of my mind.

What room in a house is a zombies not allowed in?
The living room.

More Zombie Jokes to Raise Laughter

More Zombie Jokes to Raise Laughter

How did the zombie know he had won the lottery?
It was a dead giveaway.

Why did the zombie take a day off work?
Because he was feeling really rotten.

What does a vegetarian zombie eat?
Graaaaains.

Why did the girl fall in love with the zombie?
She said he was just so infectious

Did you hear about the very emo zombie?
Every time I talked to her, she fell apart.

Where is the best place to hide from a zombie?
In the living room.

What do you call a zombie in a Chinese restaurant cooking stir-fry?
Dead man WOKing.

Why should you be cautious of sport car owners during a zombie apocalypse?
Because they will never tell you when they are turning.

Why don’t you hire a zombie to build roads?
They only make dead ends.

What do zombies blow thier noses with?
Human tissue!

Where did zombies go for a family meal?
Headquarters

Did you hear about the dyslexic zombie?
He only eats Brians.

Why don’t zombies like dad jokes?
Because they are brainless.


Even More of the Best Zombie Jokes

What kind of bread do zombies prefer?
Whole brain.

What is a zombie’s favorite type of weather?
A brainstorm.

Why did the zombie go to church?
To prey.

Can zombies do yoga?
Of corpse knot!

Where can you find the zombie’s house in a neighbourhood?
In the dead ends.

How did the zombie bodybuilder hurt his back?
He was dead lifting.

What do you call a vegetarian zombie?
A liar.

Why did the zombie eat the pirate?
Because he wanted a career change and you ARR what you eat.

Did you hear about the zombie that had a brain freeze?
It was a frozen dinner.

What is a zombie’s favorite cereal?
Brain Flakes.

What is a zombies least favorite month?
Dismember.

Why do zombies speak Latin?
Because it’s a dead language

What do you call a zombie father?
The Walking Dad

What is a zombies favorite thing to eat at the picnic?
Barbara Q.

How do zombies eat healthier?
They switch to vegetarians.

If you enjoyed these zombie jokes, we think that you will also enjoy these ghost jokes and these ghost hunter jokes.