Watermelons are amongst the juiciest fruits that you can find. With their bright red flesh and the green exterior, they are synonymous with summer. So, if you want to sink your teeth into some of the best watermelon jokes, we have some of the best and most refreshing ones for you right here.
We love the bright colors of watermelons and we also love the fun and laughter that you can get from watermelon jokes. Want to enjoy some of the best there are?
Funny Watermelon Jokes That Will Get You Laughing
What? Are you ready to get started on some of the best and funniest watermelon jokes? Let get rind into them!
When do you start on red and stop on green?
When you’re eating a watermelon!
What do watermelons say when they meet each other?
Slice to meet you.
What do you call a sad watermelon?
Melon-cholic.
Why did the watermelon go crazy?
Because he lost his rind.
What was the rapper watermelon’s biggest hit song?
Slice, slice baby.
Why did the watermelon go on holiday?
Because it needed to unrind.
A friend of mine said onions are the only food that can make him cry.
So I hit him in the face with a watermelon.
Why do watermelons make such good investors?
Because they always have seed money.
Why are watermelons never late?
Because they are always rind on time.
What did the boy watermelon say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?
You are the melon of my eye.
What do you call a Mailman who only delivers watermelon?
Post Melone
What do pumpkins, watermelons, and cantaloupes in the path of a steamroller have in common?
They all end up as squash.
What did the watermelon say during the summer while it was relaxing by the pool?
Life is gourd.
What do you call a rich watermelon?
A mellionaire.
How do you get water into a watermelon?
You plant it in the spring!
What do you call a dehydrated watermelon?
A melon.
What do you call a fruit that is convicted of armed robbery?
A waterfelon.
What is a watermelons’ favorite fantasy movie?
The Lord of the Rinds.
What did the fruit write on his Valentine’s card?
You’re one in a melon!
Why did the watermelon get a promotion?
Because it was outstanding in its field.
What do you call a dog that herds watermelons?
A Melon Collie
John has 20 watermelons and tim has none. John threw one watermelon at Tim, what does Tim have now?
A concussion.
More Watermelon Jokes That You Will Love
Need even more juicy watermelon jokes? We have planted a couple more below so that you can enjoy really biting into them. These funny watermelon jokes are great for sharing – just a ripe watermelon!
How did the watermelon entrepreneur become successful?
It seeds every opportunity that came along its way.
Why did the police decided to surveil the watermelon salesman?
Because they suspected that he was up to some seedy business.
Why do watermelons make bad plumbers?
Because they never know water problem is.
Why did the watermelon have brown spots all over its skin?
It had melonoma.
What did the watermelon say in the morning?
Rind and shine!
What is a watermelon’s least favorite racquet sport?
Squash.
Why did the truck driver say when his truckload of watermelons fell off the truck?
Let the good times roll.
Why don’t watermelons eat watermelons?
Because they are not cannibals.
Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?
Because it wanted to become a watermelon.
What did the watermelon say as he left the group?
See-d you later.
Why was the soap opera starring watermelons so popular?
Because it presented a little slice of life.
Why did the watermelon always get invited on dates?
Because it was so sweet.
Did you hear about the watermelon who starred in a soap opera?
It was melondramatic.
What’s the difference between a watermelon and a zippo?
Watermelons are pretty heavy, while zippos are a little lighter.
What did the watermelon say when the honeydew asked it to run away to Vegas and get married?
Sorry I cantaloupe.
Even More Watermelon Jokes
We have even more of the best watermelon jokes that you could hope for below. Don’t lose your rind, instead, take a bite out of these delicious and refreshing watermelon jokes that are sure to get plenty of laughs. It is a great way to enjoy summertime laughter with friends or at any time of the year.
What did the girl watermelon say to her boyfriend when he proposed?
You made my heart skip a seed.
Where did Harry Styles go to school?
Watermelon Sugar High.
Why did the watermelon get left at the altar?
Because his fiance cantelope.
What did the husband watermelon say to his wife during their anniversary?
Life is sweeter with you by my side.
Why did the watermelon go for therapy?
Because it wanted to clear up its seeds of doubt.
What did the coach tell the athlete watermelon to do even though it was tired?
He said, “You can do it! It is just rind over matter.”
A man said to his friend, “I wish I had the money to buy a million watermelons.” His friend replied, “What will you do with a million watermelons?”
The man answered, “I don’t want the watermelons, I just want the money.”
An old man is selling watermelons. His pricelist reads: 1 for $3, 3 for $10. A young man stops by and asks to buy one watermelon. “That’d be 3 dollars”, says the old man. The young man then buys another one, and another one, paying $3 for each. As the young man is walking away, he turns around, grins, and says, “Hey old man, do you realize I just bought three watermelons for only $9? Maybe business is not your thing.”
The old man smiles and mumbles to himself, “People are funny. Every time they buy three watermelons instead of one, yet they keep trying to teach me how to do business…”
If you enjoyed these funny watermelon jokes, we think that you will also enjoy these teacher jokes, burger jokes and these cowboy jokes.