Water jokes can be great fun. Everyone familiar with water and everyone can also relate to it. Water continuously cycles through the environment and this is also how water jokes can go round and round, bringing along with it laughter for everyone who hears it.
The best water jokes are simply funny and great for sharing around. In fact, approximately 60% of the human adult body is made up of water. It is crucial for various bodily functions and these functions include laughing out loud.
Here are some of the best water jokes that you will hear.
90+ Funny Water Jokes That Will Have You Drenched in Laughter
1. A friend dug a hole in the garden and filled it with water.
I think he meant well.
2.Just opened my water bill and my electricity bill at the same time…
I was shocked
3. Why doesn’t Water visit Ice?
Because they live in a different state.
4. Every time I take a drink from a bottle, it keeps pouring back.
Must be spring water.
5. On a flight, off on holiday. The cabin crew member asked what I wanted to drink.
“Water”. “Still?” “Well, I haven’t changed my mind…”
6. Where can you find an ocean with no water?
On a map!
7. What do you call a moat with no water in it?
Moot.
8. The Earth’s surface is 70% water.
That water is uncarbonated. Therefore, the Earth is flat.
9. What kind of rocks are never under water?
Dry ones!
10. What weighs more, a gallon of water, or a gallon of butane?
A gallon of water. Butane is a lighter fluid.
11. Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
They dropped out of school!
12. H20 is water, but what is H204?
It’s for swimming and drinking, of course.
13. Who carries out operations in water?
A sturgeon.
14. How do you get a pen across some water?
Biro-ing.
15. Where does a mansplainer get his water?
From the well, actually.
16. Did you hear that the President has declared that water is now only legal in three states?
Solid, liquid and gas.
17. What’s the most sarcastic body of water on earth?
The Crimea River.
18. What do you call it when a guy throws his laptop into the ocean?
Adele, Rollin’ in the Deep.
19. What happens when you get water on a table?
It becomes a pool table.
20. There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.
21. How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it!
22. What did one ocean say to another?
Nothing, it just waved.
23. What runs, but never walks?
Water!
24. During a job interview yestarday I poured some water into a cup and it overflowed slightly
“Nervous?” asked the interviewer, I simply replied “No I always give 110%”
25. What keeps a dock floating above water?
Pier pressure.
26. Why does the river have problems remembering things?
Because she is becoming sea nile.
27. Dark humor is like clean water
Everybody should get it but not everybody does.
28. Why did the ocean leave the party early?
She was getting really tide.
29. How do you make holy water?
Make sure to boil the hell out of it.
30. I love watching running water on the internet.
Was watching a live stream.
More Water Jokes That Will Have You Running for More
About 71% of the Earth’s surface is covered by water, most of which is found in the oceans and the rest is in glaciers, ice caps, rivers, lakes, and underground aquifers. Thankfully, the best water jokes can all be found here!
31. A man walks into a library and asks for a bottle of water.
The librarian says “this is a library!”. The man whispers “sorry, a bottle of water, please”.
32. What do mermaids sleep on?
Water beds!
33. If H20 is water what is H204?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming…
34. A girl agreed to go out with me after I gave her a bottle of tonic water.
Schwepped her off her feet.
35. Did you ever hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Well, well, well.
36. RIP Boiled water.
You will be mist.
37.How do you say hello to to water?
Hi drate!
38. My friend said she couldn’t afford to pay her huge water bill
So I sent her a “get well soon” card.
39. Adele might set fire to rain
But SpongeBob can make a campfire under water.
40. Why is a river an amazing roommate?
He just likes to go with the flow.
41. Today I learned that if you’re in a canoe and it flips over in the water, you can safely wear it on your head
Because it’s capsized.
42.What did the beaver say after she slipped in water?
Dam it.
43.What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
44. What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
45. What did the bottle of water say to the spy?
The names Bond…. Hydrogen bond.
46. What did the measuring cup say to the water?
I’ve had it up to here with you!!!
47. What state does the Mississippi River flow in?
Liquid.
48. Scientists found out that water is toxic.
100% of dead people drank water.
49. What did the river say when it saw beavers for the first time?
“Well, I’ll be dammed.”
50. What do you call a car focused on crossing the river?
Ford Focus.
51. A Stormtrooper tried to shoot me with a water gun.
But as usual, he mist.
52. How did the crab cross the river?
He took a taxi crab.
53. There are 2 reasons why you shouldn’t drink toilet water.
Number 1 and Number 2.
54. What happens if you throw a white hat into the Black Sea?
It gets wet!
55. Knock knock!
Who’s there? Water? Water who? Water you waiting for? Open the door!
56. The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
57.Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
58. What did the bottled water tell the spy?
The names bond, Hydrogen bond.
59. I made a New Years Resolution to drink more water.
So far I’ve only gotten as far as Drink More.
60. Why does water never laugh at jokes?
It isn’t a fan of dry humor.
Even More Funny Water Jokes to Share Around
Want to quench your thirst for water jokes and puns? Keep on reading to discover more funny water jokes that you will love. “Water” you waiting for?
61. How do you know if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If you toss it in the water and it sinks, it’s a girl. If the ant floats, it’s a buoyant.
62. Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
63. Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy.
64.. What is the ocean’s favorite lullaby?
Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
65. Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.
66. Why did the lake date the river?
He heard that she had a bubbly personality.
67. What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
Damn!
68. My friend keeps saying “Cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.”
I know he means well.
69. Why don’t you see a school in the ocean?
They just can’t wade through all that homework.
70. How do you make a water bed more bouncy?
You use spring water.
71. Why is the ocean always on time?
She likes to stay current.
72. What can you do if you are the ocean?
Whatever you want.
73. Why are oceans so meticulous?
They like to be pacific.
74. What did the sink say to the water faucet?
You’re a real drip.
75. What did an impatient pot of water say to the noodles?
Udon!?
76. What do you get when you pour boiling water down a rabbit hole?
Hot cross bunnies.
77. Where do water droplets go to settle arguments?
The Supreme Quart.
78. Just opened my water bill and my electricity bill at the same time…
I was shocked.
79. If you ever feel blue, try drinking a gallon of water before going to sleep.
That will give you a reason to get up in the morning.
80. What do you call a melted snowman?
Water.
81. What do you call two days of rain in a row in Seattle?
The weekend.
82. Why do male dogs float in water?
Because they’re good buoys.
83. What do you call a wet teddy bear?
A drizzly bear.
84. Why are the Great Lakes running out of water?
Because Americans are drinking Canada Dry.
85. Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
86. When does it start to rain money?
When there is change in the weather.
87. I asked my friend to name two places where you could store water
He was stumped. “Well, damn.”
88. Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
89. How did the raindrop ask another raindrop on a date?
He asked her “Water you doing tonight?”
90. What did one water bottle say to another?
Water you doing today?
91. What do you get when you throw a billion books into the ocean?
A title wave!
92. What kind of hair did the ocean have?
Wavy!
93. Who cleaned the bottom of the ocean?
A Mer-Maid
94 Why were the student’s grades underwater?
They were all below C level.
95. Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?
Because if they fell forwards, they would still be in the boat.
96. When does it rain money?
When there is a change in the weather.
We are sure that you loved laughing away at these funny water jokes. For even more laughs, read our list of boss jokes, car jokes and trucker jokes too!