Do you love trucker jokes? You know that you will have to keep on trucking when it comes to the funny jokes about truckers. There are many different types of truckers. Those who love to drive long haul and those who are happy to just make short runs.

These trucker jokes about truck drivers will surely have you laughing to bits. You can enjoy both a mix of short jokes as well as jokes that will go the long distance with you too.

Now sit back and enjoy these hilarious trucker jokes but be sure not to take your eyes off the road!

Funny Trucker Jokes for the Long Haul

1. What is a truckers favorite part about the movies?
The trailer.

2. What do Canadian geese, and Canadian truckers have in common?
They both block the roads and honk.

3. Why did the trucker decide to apply for a job at Microsoft?
Because they are looking for more drivers.

4. What is the highest level truck driver?
A Roads Scholar.

5. Why are truckers always in accidents?
Because they are semi drivers.

6. I have two friends. An astronaut and a truck driver.
I like the truck driver more because he seems more down to earth than the astronaut.

7. One trucker turned to another trucker and handed him a 10 dollar bill.
The second trucker turned and asked “What’s the 10 for good buddy?”

8. What did the Mexican trucker say in his defense when he got pulled over with ten tons of imported snails?
Es Cargo.

9. What do you call a trucker that doesn’t drive anymore?
Semi-retired.

10. My trucker friend asked me if I knew the date.
I said 10-4 good buddy.

Trucker Jokes that Will Sound Out Laughter

11. What’s a truckers favorite kind of house?
The houses with the long haul ways!

12. Did you hear about the trucker whose truck was carrying Microsoft software and overturned on the main road?
That’s the Word on the street.

13. Did you hear about the two cheese trucks that ran into each other?
There was de brie everywhere.

14. Did you hear about the trucker driving the sausage delivery truck that crashed?
It was the wurst.

15. How much weight can a truck hold?
As much as it can pickup.

16. Did you hear about the trucker transporting LEGOs that crashed on the highway?
Authorities are still trying to piece everything together.

17. Did you hear about the truck carrying a bunch of Omega 3 capsules that hit a pedestrian?
Thankfully, the pedestrian only sustained super fish oil injuries.

18. A trucker driving a truck loaded with Vicks vapor rub overturned on the highway.
Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours.

19. Did you hear about the job opening for a garbage truck driver?
There is no training, but you will be able to pick it up as you go along.

20. One day a trucker had a truck full of squirrels. A police officer pulled him over and said,” Sir, I’m going to need you to take these squirrels to the zoo.” The trucker did so and left. The next day the trucker was back but this time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses. The officer said,” I thought I told you to take these squirrels to the zoo.” The trucker said,” I did. Today I’m taking them to the beach.”

Even More Funny Trucker Jokes

21. A truck driver stopped at a roadside diner for lunch and ordered a cheeseburger, coffee and a slice of apple pie. As he was about to eat, three bikers walked in. One grabbed the trucker’s cheeseburger and took a huge bite from it. The second one drank the trucker’s coffee, and the third wolfed down his apple pie. The truck driver didn’t say a word as he paid the waitress and left. As the waitress walked up, one of the motorcyclists growled, “He ain’t much of a man, is he?” “He’s not much of a driver, either,” the waitress replied. “He just backed his 18-wheeler over three motorcycles.”

22. A Blond walks into a gas station and asks the employee, “I have locked my keys in the car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?” Ten minutes later a trucker comes in and can’t stop laughing. So the employee asks him why he is laughing. The trucker says: “There is a Blond who tries to open her car with a coat hanger!” The employee replies, “So what? This could happen to anyone.” Trucker, “Sure, but usually there isn’t another Blond in the car who yells: a little more right / a little more left!”

23. A trucker stops at a diner to get some coffee. Looking around, he sees the only open seat was at the far end of the counter. He goes over and starts a conversation with the farmhand next to him. After a while, the farmhand gets up to leave saying “Ya know what, yer something else. I’m gonna go up to the register and tell them that I am paying yer ticket. When I get the waitress to look over, just give a thumbs up”. “Mighty kind of ya, stranger” said the trucker, and returns to his coffee. The farmhand goes up to the register and tells the waitress, “ya see that guy at the end giving a thumbs up? He’s paying for my meal.”

24. A trucker enter into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, “I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and pair of running boards.” The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, “This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?” “No,” the cook said. “Three flat tires mean three pancakes, a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up, and running boards are 2 slices of
crisp bacon.” “Oh, Okay!” said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then
spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer. The trucker asked, “What are the beans for, Blondie?” She replied, “I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires,
headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!”

25. Two nuns who worked in a hospital were out driving in the country when they ran out of gas. As they were standing beside their car on the shoulder of the road, a truck approached them. Noticing the nuns in distress, the trucker stopped and offered to help. When the nuns explained they had run out of gas, the trucker said he would be more than happy to drain some from his tank, but he didn’t have a bucket or a can. Hearing this, one of the nuns dug out a clean bedpan from the trunk and asked the trucker if it would do. He said it would and proceeded to drain a couple of quarts into the pan. He then handed the pan to the sisters, got back into his truck and waved goodbye. While the nuns were carefully pouring the precious fuel into their gas tank, a cop happened by. He stopped and watched them for a few moments, then said, “Sisters, somehow I don’t think that’s going to work, but I sure do admire your faith!”

26. A trucker gets lost one day and as luck would have it, he comes to low bridge and gets stuck under it…cars are backed up for miles behind him….
Eventually, a cop car pulls up, the officer gets out and walks up, laughing hysterically and pointing at the trucker. He puts his hands on his hips and says with a chuckle, “Got stuck, eh?” The trucker replies, “No sir, not at all, you see, I was delivering this bridge when I ran out of gas…”

27. As a trucker stops at a red light, a woman catches up with it. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says “Hi, my name is Heather and you’re losing some of your load.” The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they’ve never spoken, the blonde says brightly, “Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!” Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, the woman gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door. The trucker lowers the window. Again she says “Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!” When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light. When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde’s car. He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says “Hi, my name is Kevin, it’s Winter and I’m driving the SALT TRUCK!”

28. After driving for about six hours, a trucker decides to pull over and sleep for a little while. As soon as he falls asleep, he is awoken by some knocks on the door of the cab. “Can you tell me the time, please?” asks a jogger. “Yeah, it’s 4:30,” answers the trucker. He falls asleep again, but he is awoken again by another jogger who wants to know the time. “It’s 4:40!” yells the trucker. Deciding to really try to sleep a little, he writes on a piece of paper: I DON’T KNOW THE TIME. He sticks the paper in his windshield. But he is awoken again by some more knocks. ‘It’s 5:25,” says another jogger.

29. There was a man driving down the road behind an 18 wheeler; at every stoplight the trucker would get out of the cab, run back and bang on the trailer door. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot. When they both had come to a stop the truck driver once again jumped out and started banging on the trailer door. The motorist went up to him and said, “I don’t mean to be nosey but why do you keep banging on that door?” To which the trucker replied, “Sorry, can’t talk now, I have 20 tons of canaries and a 10 ton limit, so I have to keep half of them flying at all times.”

30. Why did the joke-telling trucker cross the road?
To deliver the punchline!

We hope that you have enjoyed these hilarious trucker jokes about trucker drivers and their antics. If you have, we think that you will enjoy these car jokes too.