Lobsters look so distinct and that may be the secret of funny lobster jokes. These marine crustaceans are known for their hard exoskeleton, long bodies, and distinctive claws. And who doesn’t love eating them, cooked and on a dinner plate. We think that you will find these lobster jokes and puns so fun that you will get them in a pinch.
Funny Lobster Jokes and Puns
1. How did the lobsters travel around the beach?
By shell-i-copter.
2.What do you call a famous lobster?
A shellebrity.
3. Did you hear about the lobster that got a job at the pizzaria?
He is working in the crust station.
4. What do you call a belt made out of lobsters?
A waist of good seafood
5. What did the ocean say to the lobster?
Nothing, it just waved.
6. Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea weed.
7. How do lobsters like to start their mornings?
With clawfee.
8. A guy asked a waiter “How do you prepare the lobster?”
The waiter said, “We just flat out tell them that this is the end of the line.”
9. How does a lobster answer the phone?
“Shello?”
10. Why didn’t the lobster give his seat to the old lady on the bus?
Because he was shellfish.
11. Why was the lobster student crying?
Because his teacher called him a lost claws.
12. Why did the lobster decide to do shoplift?
Due to pier pressure.
13. Someone drove through Portland looking for lobster but couldn’t find any.
It was upsetting because lobster is supposed to be a Maine attraction.
14. Why did the lobster lose its fortune?
Because it kept shelling out money.
More Lobster Jokes and Puns
Lobsters are equipped with powerful claws; the larger crusher claw is used for breaking shells and other hard surfaces, while the smaller, sharper pincher claw is used for cutting and handling food. Perhaps these claws can also cut into some of these hilarious lobster jokes!
15. Where do crabs and lobsters park their public transport vehicles?
At the bustacean.
16. Why did the lobster go to the physical therapist?
It pulled a mussel.
17. A man ordered lobster for dinner.
When the waiter brought it to him, he complained, “Hey, this lobster only has one claw!” The waiter explained, “That lobster was in a fight.” “OK, then,” replied the man. “Bring me the winner!”
18. Why couldn’t the woman eat shrimp, lobsters, and clams that have been cooked by heated water vapor?
She has shellfish steam issues.
19. What do you call a crab that throws things?
A lobster.
20. What’s the difference between a lobster and a Chinese man who’s been run over by a bus?
One’s a crustacean, the other is a crushed Asian.
21. Why do lobsters make terrible friends?
Because they’re way too shellfish.
22. What happened when a lobster reported a crime to the police?
They asked him to be more Pacific.
23. What did the lobster groom referred to his new spouse as?
His “butter half.”
24. Did you hear about the lobster who said he was going to dive into the pot of boiling water?
Everybody thought he was cray-sea.
25. Why was it hard for the lobster to retire?
Because he was tide to his company.
26. What happened to the crustacean who was late for work every day?
She lobster job.
27. What do you call a crustacean playing tennis that is great a playing lob shots?
A true lob-star.
28. Where does a lobster store its clothes?
In the clawset.
29. A man walked into a seafood restaurant and asked for a lobster tail.
The waitress smiled sweetly and said – “Once upon a time, there was this handsome lobster…”
30. Why are lobsters bad at sharing?
Because they’re shellfish.
Even More Funny Lobster Jokes for a Good Laugh
Did you know that lobsters are capable of regenerating lost limbs, a useful adaptation for survival in their often harsh and competitive environments? How about regenerating laughter with these funny lobster jokes that you can share around.
31. There are two lobsters were in a tank.
The one said to the other, “It sure would be easier driving this thing without rubber bands on our claws.”
32. What do you call a lobster that’s afraid of tight spaces?
Claws-trophobic.
33. What do you call a tired and overworked lobster?
A frustracean.
34. I went to a seafood restaurant and asked how they prepared the lobster.
The waiter got quiet and simply said, “We just tell him the truth, man. ‘This is the end of the line.’”
35. A man saw a sign that said “Lobster Tails, $5” and thought it was a good deal.
He gave the man behind the stand a $5 bill and awaited his tail. Instead, the man spoke up and said, “Once upon a time, there was this lobster…”
36. Did you hear about the fight at Red Lobster?
Four fish were battered!
37.Who brings presents to good lobsters on Christmas?
Santa Claws.
38. How much salt do lobsters use when cooking pasta?
Just a pinch.
39. Where do the lobsters normally work at the bread factory?
At the crust station.
40. Did you hear about the lobster that went to the party??
It pulled a mussel
41. Why was the ocean screaming?
You would too if you had lobsters on your bottom!
42.Why was the lobster in the sandwich shop so happy?
Because it was on a roll!
43.Did you hear about the lobster that rode a sea mammal into battle?
He did it on porpoise.
44. Where are there no hipster lobsters?
In the Maine stream.
45. Where do lobsters go when they need to borrow some money?
To the prawn brokers.
46. What’s the perfect name for a pet lobster?
Clawde.
47. I ate at Mary Poppins’ Restaurant last night…
Super cauliflower cheese, but the lobster was atrocious.
48. One lobster took another lobster out on a date.
The male lobster offered to pay for dinner, which made the female lobster blush. “It’s be-claws I love you,” the lobster said.
49. What did the tied up lobster fear more than boiling water?
Claw-Strophobia
50. Did you hear about the big fight between the blue lobsters and the red lobsters?
The other lobsters said it was like a sea-n from a movie.
51. What’s worse than lobsters on your piano? Crabs on your organ.
Where do lobsters wait for the bus?
At the bustacean.
52. In a small fishing village, a Newfoundlander was walking up the wharf carrying two at-least-three-pound live lobsters, one in each hand. It was three weeks after the season closed! Whom should he meet at the end of the wharf but the Federal Fisheries Officer who, upon viewing the live and wiggling lobsters, says: “Well me Laddie I got you this time – with two live lobsters three weeks after the season Closed!” The Newfie says, “No – My Son you are wrong! These are two trained lobsters that I caught two weeks before the season ended.” The Fisheries Officer says, ” Trained like how?” “Well my son, each day I takes these two from my house down to the wharf and puts them in the water for a swim. While they swim I sits on the wharf and has me a smoke, or two. After about 15 minutes I whistles and up comes me two lobsters, and I takes them home!” “Likely story”, the Fisheries Officer says! “Lets take them on down the wharf and see if it’s true.” So, the Newfie goes ahead of the Fisheries Officer to the end of the wharf where, under supervision, he gently lowers both lobsters into the water. The Newfie sits on a wharf piling and lights up a smoke, then another! After about 15 minutes the Fisheries Officer says to the Newfie, “How about whistling?” The Newfie says ” What For?” The Fisheries Officer says, ” To call in the Lobsters” The Newfie says, ” What Lobsters?”
If you have enjoyed these lobster jokes, we think that you will certainly enjoy these shark jokes too!