Flower jokes and puns can be absolutely funny. Maybe it is because there are over 400,000 known species of flowering plants, ranging from tiny blossoms, like the Wolffia, to the giant Rafflesia arnoldii. This wide variety of flower provide plenty of subject matter for those who need a laugh with funny jokes about flowers and blooms.

We love how flower jokes can help to brighten up even the most gloomy day – just like a nice bouquet. So here are some funny flower jokes that you can share with others to brighten up their day!

Flower Jokes that are Simply Hilarious

1. Did you hear about the flower that never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.

2.What does a flower therapist ask her patients?
“Are you feeling bouquet?”

3. Someone keeps sending me flowers with the heads cut off
I think I’m being stalked

4. Where did Robin Hood buy flowers?
Sherwood Florist

5. What did the flower say when her son went off to college?
“I be-leaf in you.”

6. Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.

7. Why did the flower take her husband back after he cheated?
She rose above it.

8. How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.

9. What does a flower say when they’re offering you a job?
“Take it or leaf it.”

10. Did you hear about the flower who joined Tinder?
He just wants somebudy to love.

11. Did you hear about one flower who went on a date with another flower?
It’s a budding romance.

12. What did the flower say after he told a joke?
“I was just pollen your leg!”

13. What do you call flowers who are BFFs?
Buds.

14. How does a flower whistle?
Through its tulips!

15. Which flower is the clumsiest?
The whoopsy daisy!

16. Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together?
He just needed a kick in the bud.

17. What does the youngest flower child say?
“Last bud not least!”

18. What do you call it when two flowers have a child?
Plant parenthood.

19. What do you say when you want a flower to drive faster?
“Floret.”

20. What do flowers study in college?
Stem.

21. Why didn’t the flower get a second date?
He was a garden variety.

22. How do two flowers greet each other?
“Hey bud, how’s it growing?”

23. If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims.

24. What flower is on your face?
Your tulips.

More Flower Jokes for a Good Laugh

Throughout history, flowers have held significant symbolic meanings in various cultures. Have a good laugh with these funny flower jokes and puns.

25. A honey bee lands on a flower but is quickly kicked off by the spider living there. Perturbed, he flies away and lands on a different flower.
It was a cross pollination.

26. What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle?
They rose.

27. I took a photo of my flower.
Now it can photosynthesize.

28. I had to buy our dog flowers…
Because I accidentally called him our old dog’s name.

29. Why is a flower like the letter “a”?
Because a bee goes after it.

30. Magician: “I can turn this handkerchief into a flower.”
Little boy: “That’s nothing. I can walk down the street and turn into an alley.”

31. My wife told me I planted the wrong flowers.
Oopsie daisy!

32. A man in a flower shop was trying to pick the perfect bouquet for his wife.
He said, “It’s crazy how much money you gotta spend on something that’s just going to die.” I said, “I know… and you gotta buy them flowers too.”

33. What do you call a flower that grew up in an orphanage?
Self raising flour.

34. What’s the best flower for a boy to give his mom for Mother’s Day?
Son-flowers of course!

35. For Valentine’s Day, I received a bunch of flowers with the heads cut off.
I think I was being stalked.

36. Did you hear the joke about the dead flower?
I think I should stop telling it, it just makes no scents.

37.Wife: “Where did you put the flowers?”
Me: “In the door.” Wife: “What? How?” Me: “Relax, it’s easy because the door is ajar.”

38. My buddy just got kicked out of his house. His wife was hinting at Valentine’s Day plans and asked him if he knew her favorite flower.
“Gold Medal All Purpose” apparently wasn’t the answer.

39. My wife complains that I never buy her flowers.
I didn’t even know she sold them!

40. What did the dog do on his walk in the park?
Peony on this tree, peony on that tree.

41. What’s a gardener’s go-to pick-up line?
“You’re simply iris-istible.”

42.Why was the flower so dangerous?
It had a concealed pistil.

43.What type of garden do bakers usually have?
Flour gardens.

44. What flower in the garden is fiercest of them all?
The tiger lily.

45. What’s a pickle’s favorite type of flower?
The daffo-dill.

46. What did the seed say to the flower?
Okay Bloomer.

47. What is a bumblebee’s favorite flower?
The bee-gonia.

48. What do cartographers give to their loved ones on Valentine’s Day?
Probably compass roses.

49. What did the big flower say to the little flower?
“What’s up, little bud?”

50. What do you get if you cross a sheepdog and a rose?
A collie-flower!

51. How did the old rose make a living?
She went from house to house petaling her wares.”

52. What do you call an inn opened by a flower and a chef?
A bud and breakfast.

53. This morning my wife walked in and started hitting me with a bouquet of purple flowers.
She woke up and chose violets.

54. What did the bank-robbing flower say to its getaway driver?
“Floret!”

55. What’s a flower’s favorite game to play on Halloween?
Light as a heather, stiff as a board.

56. What’s Miley Cyrus’ alter ego in the flower world?
Hannah Lantana.

57.Why did the flower say when it was accused of lying?
I ain’t dandelion.

58. Why did the flower say to its girlfriend?
I love you a lily more each day.

59. Why did the flower terminator say after it busted down the door?
Hosta la vista, baby!

60. Why did the flower say to the newly wed couple?
Iris you all the happiness in the world.

61. Why did the flower say when to its new neighbor?
You can poppy-n anytime.

62. What is the most beautiful Italian flower?
The Spaghett-me-not.

63. Why did the flower say to encourage its co-workers to stay positive?
Thistle while you work.

64.. Why did the flower say when it was surprised?
What in carnation?

65. Why did the flower say when summer arrived?
Thistle be a beautiful day!

66. Why did the encouraging flower say to the other flower it met?
Every daisy is better because of you.

Even More Flower Jokes

Flowers have adapted to their environments in fascinating ways. For instance, it may surprise you that the Arctic poppy is able to follow the sun across the sky to maximize its exposure to sunlight. Desert flowers, such as the cactus bloom, have adapted to thrive in arid conditions. These flower jokes are also plenty of fun for anyone who needs to have their day brightened up!

67. Why did the flower say to the other flower that appeared insulted?
Get clover it.

68. Why didn’t the gardener plant flowers?
Because he hadn’t botany.

69. Why did the boy flower say to the girl flower?
I’m head clover heels in love.

70. Why did the flower say when it saw that the other flower was deep in thought?
A peony for your thoughts.

71. Why did the boy flower say when its dad?
I’m proud to be y-orchid

72. Did you hear about the flower that had to give a public speech for the first time?
It rose to the occasion.

73. How is the letter “A” like a flower?
Because a “B” comes after it

74. Nick owns a flower stand. He’s got all kinds of flowers – daisies, petunias, roses, and even wildflowers like firewheels and bluebonnets. He has the most expansive collection of flowers in the city, all of the highest quality, and business is booming.

However, one day, a group of priests moved in across the street and open their own flowers shop. Their collection is just as expansive, just as high-quality, and they begin to siphon off customers from Nick. Soon, Nick’s customer base has been nearly cut in half. Needless to say, Nick is very worried about this turn of events.

“These priests are going to drive me out of business!” Nick says to his friend, Leon. Leon thinks for a minute.

“I’ll go get my friend Hugh – he should be able to take scare them off,” says Joe. Hugh turns out to be a small guy In fact, it looks as though a strong breeze could blow him over. Nick has concerns about how effective Hugh will be, but he doesn’t really have any other options.

Hugh goes over to the priests and flexes his non-existent muscles. No sooner has he done this but they pack up and leave their shop, abandoning it. “Wow,” says Nick, “How did he do that?” His friend replies: “Didn’t you know? Only Hugh can prevent florist friars.”

We hope that you have had a good laugh with these funny flower jokes. If you have, we think that you will also appreciate these florist jokes, skeleton jokes, pickle jokes, duck jokes, panda jokes and these principal jokes too!