Flight attendants do more than just pass out snacks and remind you to fasten your seatbelt—they also bring their own brand of high-flying humour to the skies. These 70 flight attendant jokes are proof that laughter truly is the best in-flight entertainment. Whether they’re cracking jokes over the intercom or sneaking in a pun during safety instructions, cabin crew members have a way of making even the most routine flight feel special. This collection celebrates their sharp wit, clever wordplay, and contagious charm. It’s the perfect read for travel enthusiasts, airline employees, or anyone who’s ever smiled at a funny in-flight announcement.
1. I told my flight attendant joke, but it didn’t fly with the audience.
2. My flight attendant friend is great at her job,
she really knows how to wing it!
3. You want a flight attendant pun?
Please remain seated until I’ve come to a full jest.
4. Flight attendants have to handle a lot,
they’ve really got their tray tables full.
5. Why did the flight attendant break up with the pilot?
She needed more space.
6. Being a flight attendant is uplifting.
7. Don’t cross a flight attendant, or you’ll get some serious air-titude.
8. Flight attendants must be good at poker, they always have a great pokerflying face.
9. Flight attendants don’t marry pilots,
they know it’s plane wrong.
10. A flight attendant’s favourite kind of music is anything with a good altitude.
11. My flight attendant friend is a real frequent liar…I mean flyer!
12. What do flight attendants call a job well done?
Plane sailing.
13. Why was the flight attendant a good comedian?
She had a cabin full of captive audience.
14. How do flight attendants say goodbye?
“It’s time to deplane and de-pun.”
15. Why was the flight attendant always calm?
Because she could rise above the turbulence.
16. If a flight attendant messes up, does she get a sky-write up?
17. Flight attendants really know how to pack a punchline – in their overhead humour bins.
18. When a flight attendant starts to tell jokes, everyone’s in for some cabin pressure.
19. Flight attendants tell the best jokes at high altitudes – they go over your head.
20. No one tells a joke quite like a flight attendant. They always land it.
21. I used to date a flight attendant from Helsinki, but it Finnished before it took off.
22. Flight attendants are always on a new adventure, it’s just how they jet-set their life!
23. Why don’t flight attendants play hide and seek?
Because good luck hiding when you’re sky high!
24. Why did the flight attendant bring a ladder?
To help the jokes reach a new level!
25. A flight attendant’s favourite game must be “Snakes on a Plane” – talk about job security!
26. Flight attendants make the worst secret agents; their work is always up in the air.
27. Did you hear about the flight attendant who tried stand-up comedy?
She had a real turbulent set!
28. I asked a flight attendant if she could make a joke on the spot, she said “Sir, that’s not my department.”
29. Where do flight attendants go for a beach vacation?
The flight deck, of course!
30. What did the humorous flight attendant say to the pilot?
“I got your six miles high!”
31. How does a flight attendant introduce their spouse?
“Meet my significant udder – we met on a cattle class flight.”
32. Why was the flight attendant considered brave?
They’re always ready for a rough landing.
33. Why did the flight attendant bring a roll of tape?
To fix the split sides after her jokes!
34. How do flight attendants maintain their composure?
It’s all about the air of confidence!
35. Who are the best chefs?
Flight attendants, because they’ve got plenty of cabin pressure cookers!
Searching for the funniest flight attendant jokes online? You’ve landed in the right place. Whether you’re a frequent flyer, a current or aspiring cabin crew member, or just someone who can’t resist a clever aviation pun, this curated list is full of hilarious moments and airborne wit. Great for social sharing or just light reading during your downtime, these jokes cover everything from passenger quirks to inflight service mishaps—because laughter is the best kind of inflight entertainment.
36. Flight attendants don’t need yoga to stay balanced – they just adjust their altitude.
37. When a flight attendant forgets the punchline, it’s just another case of jet lag.
38. Why do flight attendants make terrible soccer players?
Because they’re always in the air!
39. What’s a flight attendant’s favorite kind of joke?
Plane old humour.
40. What do you call a flight attendant who does magic?
An air-sorcerer!
41. Why did the flight attendant bring a pillow to the bar?
In case she wanted to crash there.
42. How do flight attendants greet each other at parties?
“Hi, fly friend!”
43. Why did the flight attendant start gardening?
She wanted to put down some roots for once.
44. What do flight attendants call a bad date?
A non-stop disaster.
45. Why don’t flight attendants gossip?
Because everything they say could be overheard.
46. What’s a flight attendant’s favorite workout?
Jumpseat squats.
47. How do flight attendants stay calm during turbulence?
They just wing it.
48. What’s a flight attendant’s favorite dessert?
Sky-cream.
49. Why did the flight attendant get kicked out of the library?
She kept making *final boarding call* announcements.
50. How do flight attendants party?
In high spirits.
51. What’s a flight attendant’s favorite board game?
Risk – because they’re used to landing strategies.
52. What did the flight attendant say to the crying baby?
“We’re all losing altitude, sweetie, but you’re the loudest.”
53. Why don’t flight attendants use dating apps?
Because they prefer frequent flyer miles over swipe rights.
54. What did the passenger say to the flirty flight attendant?
“Are you turbulence? Because you just shook me.”
55. Why do flight attendants carry pens?
For when passengers *sign off* mid-flight.
56. How does a flight attendant apologize?
“Sorry, it’s just a little cabin pressure.”
57. Why did the flight attendant get promoted?
She rose to the occasion.
58. What’s a flight attendant’s favorite animal?
A flying squirrel.
59. How do flight attendants end arguments?
“Sir, I have the final say… and the snack cart.”
60. Why did the flight attendant become a therapist?
She was already great at handling emotional baggage.
61. What do flight attendants call their diary?
The flight log of feelings.
62. Why did the flight attendant bring string on board?
To tie up loose ends before landing.
63. What’s a flight attendant’s least favorite kind of turbulence?
Workplace drama.
64. Why did the flight attendant join a band?
She already knew how to handle instruments in tight spaces.
65. What did the flight attendant say during a breakup?
“This relationship is no longer cleared for takeoff.”
66. Why do flight attendants love thunderstorms?
Free light show.
67. What did the pilot say to the flight attendant after a rough landing?
“Let’s call that a controlled crash.”
68. Why did the flight attendant get a dog?
For emotional support… and better tips.
69. What’s a flight attendant’s superpower?
Smiling while saying, “I’ll check on that.”
70. Why do flight attendants always carry snacks?
Trust issues with catering.