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56 Goat Jokes That Are Simply The Best

56 Goat Jokes That Are Simply The Best

Goat jokes are a great way to have a laugh at these amazing creatures. Known for their ability to eat just about anything or to scale rocky hillsides that otherwise seem unsurmountable, goats are pretty incredible animals. That’s why these goat jokes can be a great way to celebrate their abilities and characteristics.

Funny Goat Jokes that Kids Will Love

Funny Goat Jokes that Kids Will Love

1. As two hungry goats were eating movie film stock, one turned to the other and said,
“I don’t know about you, but I thought the book was better.”

2.What do you call a goat who works in a donut shop?
A battering ram.

3. Have you heard about the new show about mountain goats?
Every episode ends on a cliffhanger.

4. What do you call a goat dressed up as a clown?
A silly billy.

5. What kind of pants do goats wear?
Billie Jeans

6. What did the goat who was very bored, say?
“Meh!”

7. What did the goat say when her kids were being naughty?
“I need a good nanny.”

8. What did Scrooge see when he spent the festive season on the farm?
The goats of Christmas past.

9. What farm animal is always in trouble?
The scapegoat.

10. How does a goat sign his Christmas cards?
Season’s bleatings.

11. Where do goat journalists usually work?
Bleat Street.

12. What did Bill Murray say when he visited the haunted farm?
“I ain’t afraid of no goats.”

13. What do you get when you ask a goat to DJ at your party?
A sick bleat.

14. A farmer heard some funny noises from one of his goats.
Turns out the goat was just kidding.

15. How do you stop a goat from charging?
You take away its credit card.

16. What do mountain climbers share around the campfire?
Goat stories.

17. What did the young goats say to the farmer when they were caught playing a prank?
“Sorry, we were just kidding!”

18. What do you call a goat who paints pictures?
Vincent Van Goat.

19. Where does an angry goat write down its problems?
On the ram-page

20. Whats a mountain goats favourite name?
Cliff.

More of the Best Goat Jokes

More of the Best Goat Jokes

Did you know that goats are highly social creatures that thrive in groups. They communicate with each other through various vocalizations, body language, and even facial expressions. We think that they would definitely be sharing one or two goat jokes amongst themselves.

21. I saw a cartoon portraying a politician as a goat.
It was satyr.

22. A goat, a drum, and a snake fell off a cliff..
Baa- dum- ssss

23. What was the movie about the baby goat who learned martial arts called?
The Karate Kid.

24. What’s a goat’s favourite day of the week?
Satyrday.

25. What did the papa goat say to the mama goat when she was giving birth?
You’ve goat to be kidding me!

26. Where do you find a goat with no legs?
Right where you left it

27. What did the goat say when he had an argument with his friend?
“I don’t want to butt heads with you.”

28. What do you call a goat that enjoys cleaning?
A room-baaaaa.

29. You know what really gets my goat?
El Chupacabra

30. Why did the farmer stop stuffing goats into his truck?
There was no more ruminant.

31. Billy is the perfect name for a newborn goat.
As a child, it’ll be “Billy the Kid.” As an adult, it’ll be “Billy Goat.”

32. I let my goats get whatever they want; I spoil them rotten.
I guess you could say I have a bleeting heart.

33. How do you stop a goat from charging?
Take away its credit cawr.

34. What’s the best butter on the farm?
A goat.

35. What do you call a beard on a billy?
A goatee.

36. What do you call a baby goat that’s sleeping?
A kid-napper.

37.What did the father goat say to the mother goat when he denied that her baby was his?
“The kid is not my son.”

38. What’s a goat’s favorite drink?
Goat-arade.

39. What did the sheep say when the billy ate her dinner?
“You have goat to be kidding me!”

Even More of the Best Goat Jokes

Even More of the Best Goat Jokes

Besides their ability to scale steep slopes, goats have even been known to climb trees in search of food. There must be a goat joke in there somewhere but we will need to scale up to find out!

40. What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a goat?
You get a hare in your milk.

41. Why is it so hard to have a good conversation with a goat?
Because they’re always butting in.

42.What do you call a goat swimming really fast in a lake?
A motor goat.

43.What’s a kid’s favorite nursery rhyme?
“Row, row, row your goat.”

44. Where do you find a goat with no legs?
Right where you left it.

45. What do billies like to eat for breakfast?
Goatmeal.

46. What does a rapping goat call their verbal drum skills?
Bleat boxing

47. Where does an angry goat write down its problems?
On the ram-page.

48. Why are goats from France so musical?
Because they have French horns.

49. What do you call a South American, goat-killing monster with a cold?
Achoopacabra.

50. What do you call a mountain goat?
A hillbilly.

51. A goat, a drum, and a snake fell off a cliff…
Baa dum ssss.

52. Why did the goat run off a cliff?
Because it didn’t see the ewe-turn.

53. Two goats are eating garbage. The first one finds a roll of film and eats it. When he’s done, the second one asks, “how did you like the movie?”
The first one responds, “it was OK, but I liked the book better.”

54. Patient: “Doctor, I keep thinking that I’m a goat.”
Doctor: “How long have you felt like this?”
Patient: “Ever since I was a kid.”

55. Two hunters are walking through the woods when they come across a large hole.
It’s so deep that they can’t see the bottom. One hunter goes looking for something to throw down the hole hoping to see how deep it is. He finds a rusty old anvil near by and throws it down the hole. The hole is so deep they never hear it hit the bottom. Suddenly, they hear speeding hooves behind them and a goat goes flying past them and jumps right into the hole. A few seconds later, they hear a farmer calling out for his goat. “Betsy! Betsy!” He sees the two hunters and asks if they had seen his goat Betsy.”Yeah”, they say, “She ran right passed us at like 80 miles and hour and jumped right into this hole!”
“That’s impossible, the man says, “I had her chained to an anvil! ”

56. One day a man drove by a farm and saw a two-legged goat. The man went up to the farmer and said, “Excuse me, but why does that goat only have two legs?” “Well,” said the farmer, “that goat is very special. One time my wife was cooking something she stepped out of the kitchen and it caught on fire. No one in the house knew about it but the goat, and he saved me, my wife, and my 2 kids.” “That’s amazing!” said the man, but why does the goat only have two legs?” “Well, there was that time the goat saw a big storm coming and we didn’t. The goat ran into the house and dragged us out to the storm cellar. If it weren’t for that goat we would all be dead.” “But still, that doesn’t explain why the goat only has two legs.” “And I remember the time my youngest son was stuck up a tree, but I was too far away to hear his cries for help. The goat ran to me and led me to where he was.” “Well, that is a miracle, but how come that goat only has two legs?” the man said quite annoyed at this point.
“Well,” said the farmer, “with all that goat has done for us, we figured it would be a shame to eat him all at once.”

Do be sure to check out some funny cow jokes as well or owl jokes that are simply a hoot!